How To Be A Good Christian Husband
Introduction
In Ephesians 5 we learn a lot of what God expects of a Christian Husband. But note, first, that Ephesians 5 starts off with the words, “So be imitators of God, as his dear children.”
Imitators of God? Yes, exactly. God expects you, as the husband in your relationship, to imitate Him. That means you have to follow God in your marriage.
Love Your Wife
The first requirement of the Bible is that you have to love your wife. And how do you imitate God in love?
This might not come as a surprise to you (or maybe it does) – God’s love for his people was so great that He let his own Son die on the cross of Calgary just so that his people would have a way to be excused of their sins.
In similar manner you should be willing to die for your wife. And while it is surely meant to be interpreted literally, you should also interpret it figuratively.
In other words, you should let your own desires “die” if they are standing in the way of your wife’s desires. Example: If you want to go play golf this Saturday, but your wife really wants you to go with her to get the groceries for the month, then you should crucify your desire and cheerfully assist your wife with the grocery shopping.
I am sure you can come up with many more examples of this in action.
Be Faithful to Your Wife
In Ephesians 5: 3 we read, “Do not let sexual sin, impurity of any kind, or greed even be mentioned among you, as is proper for saints.”
Being unfaithful to your wife is not only against God’s will, it is also one of the most guaranteed ways to break up your marriage.
Most men that cheat do it from a fundamental lack of respect for their wives. It comes, probably, from the age when a woman was seen as a man’s property, for him to do with as he wishes.
This lack of respect, however, goes against all that is holy in the marriage, and therefore it is against God’s will.
Submit To Your Wife
“Wow, that is a new idea,” you say.
No, not really. It is found in Ephesians 5: 21, “Submit yourselves to one another out of reverence for Christ.”
Notice that it does not only say that a wife should submit to her husband, but also that the husband should submit to his wife.
The key thing here is to know what the will of God is, and submit to your wife if she shows you that you have strayed from the path that is God’s will.
Be The Head Of Your Wife
To be the head means to take the responsibility – NOT to be the “boss”. You should take the full responsibility for the life that you and your wife have together.
In order to do that properly, you also have to take the responsibility to study the Word of God in order to find God’s will for you and your wife.
You should never do anything, or expect your wife to do anything, that falls outside the will of God!
That is the meaning of being the head of the household.
Respect Your Wife
You should respect your wife as a human being. But also respect her as a woman – more specifically, the woman that was given to you by God. She is very special, because she is the one made by God specifically for you.
You also have to respect her opinions and ideas, as well as her ambitions, dreams and wishes.
Never think that yours are the only important dreams or ambitions, but realise that your wife has just as much right to having her own ambitions and dreams because she is also a child of God, just like you.
When you make love to your wife you also have to respect her sexual preferences. Never force her to do anything that makes her uncomfortable.
Give Her Security
Your wife needs security. This is one of the fundamental things that you should provide.
But “security” does not only involve money, although financial security is part and parcel of the security that you should provide. However, if you give your wife a million dollars “to keep her happy” while you go gallivanting all over, you are not providing her with real security.
Real security is for her to know, beyond a shadow of doubt, that you love her with all your heart. Real security is for her to know that you will never, ever be unfaithful to her. Real security is for her to know that she can always rely on you to assist her with anything and everything that she requires your help with. Real security is for her to know that you find her attractive. Real security is for her to know that you do not wish to have sex with any other woman on earth. And, finally, real security is also to provide for her and the family financially.
You have to provide your wife with security because that is what God expects you to do. But you also have to provide her with security because a lack of security is a big part of why women would eventually cheat on their husbands – to try and find someone who will give them security.
Summary
In order to be a Good Christian Husband there are many things you should do. The beginning of them all is to let yourself be guided by the Word of God. If you are a Good Man as God intended for you to be, you will be a Good Husband according to God’s Word.
